Whining and Grumbling

Do your kids whine and complain? "I'm hungry. Why can't we...? I'm bored. Why do we have to...?" It is natural but terribly annoying. As I recently thought about my annoyance with my kids over their apparent discontent, it was ironic because I was, in turn, whining about their excessive whining. And I was complaining over their complaining too much.

I wonder if God gets tired of our whining and complaining over every little thing. For some reason, I expect my life to be perfect--according to my perfect plan. And if it is not perfect, I get mad or disappointed or frustrated. If my kids are just being kids, I get annoyed that they are too loud or they are teasing each other too much or...they are SCREAMING...AGAIN!

God wants us to be content. This means I should not always wish for a different season in my life or for my kids to grow out of...or for my husband to... or for my boss to... or for traffic to...or for summer to...or for Christmas to... or for the next vacation to.... This list could go on forever, and each time we wish for something different, we miss out on what God has in this time, place and circumstance. God wants to show His power, presence, and grace right now in the pain, joy, loss, or success.

I don't have to keep fighting against every...single...imperfection in my day. I just told my son this: "Don't make everything a battle." Don't fight against having to wake up early to go to school or work. Don't fight against the things God has placed in your life right now. Just accept them as gifts from God. School is a blessing. Appreciate it. Remember that some kids don't have the ability to go to school. Work is a blessing. Appreciate it. Family is a blessing. Appreciate them.

Stop fighting to try and make your life perfect and without mistake. We cannot make our lives perfect because we are imperfect sinners and we live in a fallen, sinful world. But God is perfect, and He is on our side. Jesus completed the work required to give us peace in this imperfect world.

"Day after day, every priest stands and performs his religious duties; again and again he offers the same sacrifices, which can never take away sins. But when this priest had offered for all time one sacrifice for sins, he sat down at the right hand of God." (Hebrews 10:11-12).

Cleaning and Uncleaning Your House

Photo: L. Navarrete

Lately, my house is cleaner than usual because it is for sale. So it has to be ready to show on short notice. However, I did not get any calls to show the house for several weeks, so I started to slack off with my daily cleaning chores. Then the call came: "Can I show your house today? We can be there in 20 minutes." My response? "Yes, but I have lots of kids including a newborn, and it would be great to have a little more time to prepare." Thankfully, they were viewing houses again a few days later, so we arranged an appointment for noon on Thursday.

I woke up at 7:00 on Thursday morning to my sweet 7-week-old crying for milk, of which he had also woken at 1:00, 3:00, and 4:30 am. But no going back to sleep for this tired supermom because I had a house to clean and five hours to do it! Thankfully, three kids were going to school, and my amazing mom was coming to help out with the babies and with the cleaning.

The second floor was my first task: making beds, putting clothes away, dusting, cleaning the bathrooms, emptying trash cans, putting out the white towels/comforters/soaps, turning on lights, opening the blinds, hiding all the clutter that was on every table and dresser. All this is because, of course, you can't show a house that looks lived in. But this home is more than lived in when we have five kids including a newborn with reflux, a 2-year-old that loves to bring her sippy cup onto the carpet, and three other kids that track in dirt. Plus we have a beagle that runs away every day, jumps on dining room tables, steals our food, and knocks over Caleb's full cups of milk. Despite the reality of our crazy life here at home, it has to look like a model home if we expect to sell it.

The baby was tired from waking up all night, so he slept most of the morning, enabling mom and me to complete the house preparations! And Sadie was entertained by Mickey a little more than I would usually allow. I had not completed all the vacuuming, but it was time, so I loaded the car and set out to pick up Emma. Mom let the prospects in and waited on the porch while they examined the property, hopefully noticing how perfectly clean it looked.

As soon as they left, I spent a few minutes uncleaning the house to make it ready for kids again...

Why Stop at 1 or 2 Kids?

Photo: R.A. Navarrete

Most American families have only 1-2 kids nowadays. Once people find out I am pregnant with Baby #5, I hear comments such as:

-Why so many kids?

-Are you Catholic? Or Mormon?

-Don't you know how this happens?

-Are you done yet?

-Boy, your hands are really full.

-Wow! I could never handle that.

I have heard comments like these since I was pregnant with my third child, as if there is something wrong with having more than 1-2 children. So why have a large family?

1. We were unable to get pregnant the first time and tried for about a year and a half. During that time we prayed that God would bless us with children. And now, 8 years later, I am about to have a fifth baby.

2. Children are a blessing from God. The Bible says: 

"Be fruitful and multiply." (Genesis 1:28). 

"Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are children born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them." (Psalm 127:4-5). 

"Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." (Matthew 18:3). 

"Jesus said, let the little children come unto me and do not hinder them." (Matthew 19:14). 

"You created my inmost being. You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made." (Psalm 139:13-14).

3. Life with many children is adventurous and rewarding. You never know what fun each day may bring. For example, today we made popcorn and hot cocoa, played Dominoes, watched "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs," and ate pizza for supper. And now, at 10 pm, my 4-year-old is still wide awake in her bed. One of my kids has missed her first week of school after Christmas break because she has had a fever for 5 days. My 20-month-old now sings "Jesus Loves Me" in English and Spanish with me at bedtime. Some days there are 6-8 kids here at our house all playing and entertaining each other.

4. Having a lot of children is a test of character, and it will help to develop patience, selflessness, perseverance, and faith. But is it really harder to raise 3+ kids? Sometimes it is harder with more kids because there is more to do and manage. But the more kids there are, the more they play together. And, like the Luvs commercial shows, experienced moms simplify things and streamline processes such as preparing lunches, loading up the car, and adjusting bedtime routines. Believe me, it is quite stressful at times, so I need a lot of prayer, support, encouragement, advice, and help from family. But if I can do it, anyone can. My husband is a patient and laid back person, so he does not get overwhelmed by multiple screaming/crying children at the same time. And while I am not so relaxed, I cope with the difficult moments with a brief "Help me, Lord!" or a bite of chocolate or a quick game of Tetris.